Excuse me while I stuff my face with this while I type. And by the way Giorgios Pizza is the best pizza in the city of San Francisco. End of story. You're welcome for the tip!
My employer offers leads coaching for managers. It's a wonderful benefit that I wanted to take advantage of. It's confidential and meant to help leaders grow their skills or work through challenges. I don't know why but every call I have with my coach seems to steer away from work and toward my brain. I have a confidence issue. There, I've said it. To the outside world, I probably seem confident (maybe even overly confident) but I have negative thoughts that pop in my head often and I've devoted a lot of work toward refocusing them.
My coach encouraged me to read up on something called Imposter Syndrome. Have you heard of it? It's basically a fear of being "found out" that you don't have the skills or intelligence other people perceive you to have. It's not really a syndrome - more of an experience some people have at one point or another. Aside from the workplace, where I definitely underestimate my value, I also think I experience Imposter Syndrome when I run. I let my newness to the sport get in my head. Despite the hours I put into training and preparation, I still sometimes think I don't deserve to be in a race for fear of being found out.
Why do we do this to ourselves? I have every right to be wearing these running / biking shoes. I've earned my sore knees and my calloused feet just like the elites. :)
The Dude went to work with Jon today and I saw this picture pop up in my photo stream. Look at this kid. Attacking that wall! Go The Dude!
Part of what's helped me feel more confident in general is stepping outside of my comfort zone...understanding that feeling a little anxiety or nervousness is OKAY. It's a natural human emotion and it doesn't mean I need to stop trying new things. Jon and I talk a lot about wanting our children to be excited about new things, and helping to foster that part of their personalities. The best things I've ever done in life have started with a feeling of uncomfortableness. Do you agree?
Here's Jon attacking HIS brain by showing up for jiu jitsu. Have I mentioned that he does this? I told him the other night that the idea of doing his sport gives me a huge amount of anxiety! He is a beast (in a good way!). I'm so proud of him for getting out there and rolling with brown and black belts because he knows it's what will make him better.
And I continue to master the art of the bike cage quick change. Today was hot pink themed!!
Tomorrow I run 6 and then Sunday is my long one -- 12 miles. I'm really enjoying my nightly yoga sessions at home. I set up my battery operated candles (I have kids who would def burn down the house if they were real) and yoga mat, and open all the windows. I can hear the fog horns from the Bay and smell the eucalyptus trees from the park. It is so relaxing. Thank you, San Francisco.